Things Get Better but You Feel Worse (and What to Do)
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Episode Summary:
There's this wild phenomenon that can stop you from having your biggest income months and biggest breakthroughs in business yet… and it might not be what you expect. What if the toughest emotional moments in business happen not when things are going wrong—but when they’re starting to go right?
In this episode, I’m exploring why things can feel emotionally harder after you’ve made it through a challenging season—when you finally have the capacity to process what you’ve been through. We’ll talk about why this happens, how patience plays a crucial role during periods of growth, and practical shifts to help you navigate this experience with more grace and resilience.
Topics:
Why you might feel worse when things are actually getting better
Why this shows up in business when you’re gaining momentum
The role of patience when navigating growth seasons
How to trust your own timeline and stop comparing yourself online
A practical mindset shift for navigating the 'lag time' between your actions today and your future results
Episode Resources:
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Anna (00:06):
Welcome to the Heart-Centered Entrepreneur podcast. I want you to be rich. Yes, I want abundant financial success for your business, but I don't just care about your business making money. I care about you too. I want you to be rich and happiness in the impact you make in your relationships and in how you give back. I'm Anna. I built my six figure business as a side hustle while I was pregnant with my daughter in 2016. Now I've helped dozens of women do the same. I'm here to help you build a profitable, heart-centered fully book business with the latest tips on sales and visibility with proven mindset hacks and sneak peeks behind the scenes with what's working right now in the online space and in my business ready to make more money with heart. Let's go.
Anna (00:50):
Let's talk about patience in business. This topic that we do not want to talk about but is so interesting because I think as ambitious women, women that want more and crave more and desire more and are really driven by, by living a bold and brave life, even if we also like hate that about us, is just such an interesting concept because about three clients recently I've had this conversation with, and I think it might really, really help you if you are in a season of feeling super impatient, AKA, you're working on breakthrough in your business in one area. Maybe you're like really struggling to, maybe you're really good at sales, but you feel like, oh, I really am, my audience isn't big enough and I haven't cracked the code on like lead generation. Or maybe you have a lot of leads and you have a lot of visibility and you have a big Instagram, but you're really struggling to convert and clarify your message or whatever it is off.
Anna (01:48):
For a lot of my clients, after they grow to six figures, it is really figuring out team and understanding how to be a leader and hire and fire and manage and all of that. So we all have something and we all have different things in our business that take longer than others and shorter than others, right? Maybe you, it was really easy out the gate to make your first 20 k and then you got stuck, right? Or maybe vice versa. You got really stuck at zero for a long time. And then maybe some of the growing and scaling pieces were easier because you had, I find for a lot of my clients that like work in corporate and have jobs that mirror like higher level skills like managing a team and stuff like that. Like they're like, oh, why do I have to go from scratch and like struggle at the beginning baby stuff of entrepreneurship.
Anna (02:35):
But if you can make it past that, you're gonna be a natural at that mid-level stuff, right? Because of our personality, because of our life experiences, because of our past trauma or whatever, right? Like we all have different phases of business that are gonna be easier or harder for us. We all have different challenges in business that are going to require different levels of patience and tenacity. Um, and so I want you to think and say out loud right now, what is that area of business right now that you are feeling challenged by and stuck around? Maybe it's at the beginning, clarity on your message or clarity on your offer. I got super stuck for a long time on really getting clear on my message and I almost quit because of it. Um, I also really, about a year ago now, started doing Facebook ads and was really feeling challenged around learning them and like bullying myself into learning a new skillset, right?
Anna (03:31):
And I think in these times of needing patience in the moment, it seems really long, even if it's like 30 days, 90 days, right? But in the big picture, it's really not that big of a deal. Even thinking about getting visible online for the first time, right? At first it's really hard, but after it's like, oh my God, that's so easy. It's easy to create videos, it's easy to go live. Like no big deal, right? So the concept I wanna share with you today though is this idea that as we get closer to success, as we get closer to breakthrough, it's actually normal for us to feel more impatient and more dissatisfied. I'm gonna say that again. As we get closer to breakthrough, as we get closer to success, as things start working often, that's when we start feeling the crappiest. And this is so interesting and it's why I see so many women so close to breakthrough and success give up right before it starts ticking off.
Anna (04:30):
And I don't think this is self-sabotage. I think this is because of an interesting phenomena and I wanna describe it to you today, and I hope it helps. So you guys know that I'm a big fan of this belief that like what we see happening in our life in business is really a result of what we did like 30 or 90 days ago, right? If you are showing up to the gym for the first week, you are not gonna see results on week one. When are you gonna see results from going to the gym? Probably like week like eight or nine or 12, right? Maybe a little bit before, but most results are delayed from our action. This is a little bit hard for us to believe now when we are in a world of instant gratification of Amazon Prime, right? That what we do now, we are going to see results on later and it doesn't even have to be that much later, right?
Anna (05:24):
But like as you're getting visible online and building trust with new people in your audience, it's gonna take 30 days, 60 days, 90 days for them to trust you before they buy from you. And here's what I want to say to you. It's good that this happens because this is where lasting results come. If you buy into some sort of weight loss technique that gives you results tomorrow, number one, that's not healthy. Number two is not gonna last, right? Same thing with like if a business coach is promising you like, this is gonna get you 10 K tomorrow, like sneeze and make money, right? Like, I just hate this messaging too of like sneeze and make money too sneeze and make passive income. Because what I think it does is it makes ours, we feel like there's something wrong with us if business is hard, we think there's something wrong with us If business takes a minute to click off, right?
Anna (06:16):
And even like think about me, right? I was able to book my business fairly fast in about three months once I really started selling, but even that took time. People were not buying from me on day one. It really still took me 90 days of showing up, of selling, of sharing my message, right? Like, and I just wanna remind you too, like, okay, anyway, back to my point and then I'll loop back more on it. So here's the reason though, why I think we start to get more impatient as it's about to come to fruition. A few reasons. Number one, because we've already been taking action for a long time. So we're like, come on, I've been going to the gym, I've been launching my product, I've been showing up, right? So we get, we're like, why hasn't it happened yet, right? Because in the very beginning on week one we're like, okay, I just put in a week or two.
Anna (07:05):
But by the time you put in 12 weeks, you're like, come on, I have something to lose, right? It's more risky. But I also think that sometimes as we start to see results, like this is what I'll see happen for my clients, right? They'll start showing up, they'll start taking action, they start signing clients, but maybe it's not as many clients as they wanted. Maybe they're not fully booked yet, right? As you actually start to get traction, I think it's, it's almost like you get a like tiny taste of the piece of chocolate and you're like, oh, I want the whole chocolate bar, right? And so we make that wrong and we're like, Hmm, I don't, I'm not gonna eat any at all. Instead of like, oh my goodness, I'm so thankful for this little taste and I wanna create more, right? I think as ambitious women, we need to hold this duality of being grateful for what we have, owning the success we've had and saying also, God, I want more, right?
Anna (07:57):
And for me, this is where we miss. I hear a lot of my clients saying like, oh, I haven't had any traction in the last 30 days, but when we actually talk about it, they're like, well, it's true. I actually did have a client pay me in full for the very first time. I actually did have two features that just went out that I had pitched myself to podcasts, right? Like often I find that my clients that express the most dissatisfaction actually are having some results and having some traction, but not owning it because in their head they're like, oh, but it's not enough. Oh, I had one client pay me in full this week, but I wanted three clients to pay me in full this week, right? And which is totally fine, it's totally fine to say I want more, but also to own.
Anna (08:38):
And things are going well and things are going great. I think we're so in the habit of getting results by beating ourself up that we, it feels foreign to get results by being kind to ourself by saying, wow, I'm doing great. I signed a client, I got two features, I want more. Right? It's okay to feel good on the way to where you're going. Okay? But that wasn't even my main point. <laugh>. My main point is that often when we're in a season of hardship or trauma or survival, and sometimes we have little chapters like this in business, right? Like especially if you have a lot of visibility blocks or fears around getting visible as you're getting visible for the first time, not just in your business but in life. There can be a lot of self judgments or others' judgments, right? Maybe you put an offer out there and no one bought it and you cried in the shower.
Anna (09:29):
AKA totally has happened to me, right? Maybe you did a Facebook live and no one attended it, right? These times can be lightly scarring for us. And so I find too, but when you're in the moment of survival or of doing something hard and challenging, that's not really time that you're gonna feel the feels around it, right? Like when you're climbing a mountain, the adrenaline's running and you're climbing the mountain, right? Same thing in business. When we're in a hard chapter of business, we're going, we're going, we're going. It's often not till you're at the top of the mountain or near the top that you're like, you start crying, right? I don't know about you, but this totally happened to me and my divorce, it wasn't really till after I divorced that I was like, oh my goodness. Like that was really hard and bad, wasn't it?
Anna (10:13):
It's almost like when you're in the forest, you can't see the forest from the trees. And so it's this interesting phenomenon that as things start to get better, it actually feels worse because we're healthy enough, we're thriving enough to be able to start seeing clearly, to be able to start processing what's happened in a prior season. So if you are in a season of feeling really frustrated or sad or discouraged, I would really ask you, what is it that you're processing? Are you processing what's happening right now in real time? Or are you processing something that happened three months ago, six months ago? The reason this is important because yes, give yourself permission to feel the feels, but don't change what you're doing. 'cause probably what you're doing right now is actually working, right? You are just feeling the feels from before. But if you look at the reality of what is happening today, you probably are seeing some signals of like, oh, actually things are working.
Anna (11:08):
People are buying from me, not as much as I'd like, not as fast as I want, but oh actually things are working now, right? They weren't before and I'm kind of frustrated and sad and mad at God about that. Fine, have your little tantrum, right? Process your fields. I'm not saying that in a mean way, but also owning like, oh, now actually things are good, things are looking up. I'm seeing little, little signals that things are going great. Now is not the time to give up, right? And doing some journaling, doing some forgiveness work, doing some processing on that past chapter, right? But it's usually when we're feeling safe and resolved and things are improving, that we have the capacity, that we have the safety, that we have the clarity to feel. I hope that helps. <laugh>, I hope that that resonates. I hope that that keeps you in your action, keeps you moving forward in your business, but also lets you process maybe a time before that was hard.
Anna (12:05):
That was frustrating. Okay, as we close, I just wanna normalize that business is hard. Things take patience, but it's because you're doing something that is, is gonna have a really big payoff. I think we forget sometimes, right? You are working on your six figure year, your three day work week. What we have the ability that the fact that I am able to make multi six figures on a three day super flexible work week and feel as much peace and happiness in my work as I do, is honestly a miracle. Like what we experience as women in what is available to us in this day and age because of technology, because of everything is honestly nothing short of a miracle. I feel like we were living in an interesting moment in time and it's something that before I had it, I didn't even quite believe I could have it.
Anna (12:57):
I'm like, that sounds too good to be true, that I could make money and I, for me, I even had the first goal of like $76,000, right? I didn't even imagine that I could be taking home well over six figures in my business, right? Consistently. But I think it really is knowing that what we're trying to do is nothing short of a miracle. So it does take a little bit of time. It does take a little bit of work, right? And honestly, it's not really work like hard effort and labor, it's not really work like having to work like 70 hour work weeks. It's mostly mindset. It's mostly courage, it's mostly vulnerability. It's mostly like checking our ego at the door, being able to do brave hard things. Like that's the type of work, it is normal for business to take that. That's why we have coaches in it with us.
Anna (13:42):
That's why we have business sisters that say it's okay, right? Because really we're going after something that so few women are willing to go after, and that is a successful, thriving, aligned heart center business. But you're not alone in this, right? Um, something that's really helped me in this journey too is just doing my best to release comparison. Not just comparison to other women, but also comparison to yourself, right? I even think about this as we experience like changes in our body, right? Or like how do you really look at like how old you are today? This the set of hands, the reality you are where you're at in this level of life. It would be so easy to feel like we are behind or whatever. Instead of like, I'm gonna make the most of what I can out of what I have, out of the resources, out of the passion I have right now.
Anna (14:29):
And not compare myself to everyone else. Like everyone else is on their own timeline, their own track. You're exactly where you're meant to be. If you're listing this podcast episode right now, I do not believe in mistakes. I believe you're listening to it for a reason. And I do believe that you are where you're at in your life for a reason right now where you're meant to be. Can you trust that? Can you surrender and believe you are not behind? You are not behind. There's no such thing as behind. I say this in my mastermind all the time. There's no such thing as behind. Just show up with what you have right now today. That's enough, that's enough. And speaking of the mastermind, I know I'm recording this like two months early, but if I have spaces open for the mastermind, mastermind starts this week.
Anna (15:14):
And also it's my birthday week when this publishes. So I would love to connect you with you on a free 20 minute CEO session. Basically it's a free coaching session where I can get you breakthrough in your business in those 20 minutes on whatever is holding you back from creating your six figure year, on a three day work week. And maybe you just leave the session and that's enough. Or maybe you leave the session and you're like, okay, I want Anna's help in me executing this plan on in the mastermind together. If you've done a session with me like this before, you know it's a no strings attached call or I'm happy to coach you for 20 minutes and get you breakthrough. It really is in my mind, my way of giving back. I believe God fuels me with the clients, with the resources that I need, and all I have to do is show up with my love and my care and attention.
Anna (15:59):
That means some people will buy from me, some won't. And so I hope you hop on this 20 minute free CEO assessment session, willing to be served, willing to be cared for, willing to strategize in your business. And we usually pick one specific area that's holding you back, whether it's messaging or visibility or sales or team, um, and really hone in on that one area that you need patients on, right? So that ideally you can break through it faster, right? So that ideally you won't need as much patience on it because you can start getting that clarity and that traction in your business wherever in your client map. You guys know I talk about a client map, right? The path that someone goes from never seeing you online before to paying you money and then paying you money again and again and again with recurring income, right?
Anna (16:47):
And so us really looking at that map, us taking at CEO assessment and figuring out what is most holding you back from leads on autopilot from cash that is recurring from business that is feels filled with ease. Maybe it's not always easy, but it should always be filled with ease and with levity. I truly feel in my business, I have clients I love, I have, I do work that I enjoy. I do it in a schedule that's really flexible. I shared in my stories this week that I took my kids camping last night and it's a Wednesday, right? I thought I had reserved this beach camping spot for a Saturday, but I didn't. I did it for Wednesday. But I'm like, we're gonna go anyway because I know I have slow mornings and I have that buffer there, right? Like you deserve margin and buffer for whatever your happy, boring dream life looks like. For me, it means a three day work week so I can show up for my kids on field trips so that I can take slow mornings and work out, right? Like you deserve that freedom, that abundance, and I would love, love to help you get there. Okay? Have a beautiful week and sang a prayer for extra patience for you wherever you're at in business.
Anna (17:56):
Thanks for hanging out today. Please hit that subscribe button so you can make sure to stay updated anytime a new episode drops. And I would love for you to join me in my free Facebook community's called The Heart-Centered Entrepreneur. We discuss the podcast episodes. I regularly go live and do free trainings, and you may even meet your newest biz bestie so you can join at https://heartcenteredcommunity.com/. It's absolutely free and I cannot wait to see you in there.
PS: In the midst of this challenging time I’ve been asking myself what I can do to help? One of the #1 ways I support my clients is by helping them simplify their business so that they can increase the flow of money without creating extra work. In this season simplified visibility and sales is needed more than ever.
So if you’re craving personal support as you reposition your free and paid work, I’d love to help you simplify your sales process so that you can produce income in your business even during a challenging time. If you want support you can check out my services and book a free discovery call here, or you can send me a DM on Instagram.